Single Christian, You’re Not Alone

When I sat down to write this week’s messages, I did so with Christian Singleness, God, and faith in mind.

At the age of forty-three, I would have to say, I have been single for the majority of my life. And in those moments when I was not, I made poor choices in the men I allowed to take up space in the comfort of my home – better known as my heart. Further, I did not allow God to move in my life. Instead, I allowed my mind to make choices that weren’t mine to make.

Who’s Leading Your Life?

As humans, we sometimes hide behind what we think is best for us versus what God has planned for us. So quick to judge, we allow our minds to lead us versus our spirit which is divinely and intimately connected to God. When we do, we find ourselves unequally yoked in seasons of companionship.

“Sure, he might not believe in Jesus, but he believes in “a god” and that is enough, right?” “Maybe she lies sometimes, but they are only small lies, so that is acceptable since God forgives us, right?

These things are contradictions to who we are “Christians” – so why do we compromise on the men or women we allow in our lives?

Our Father tells us we should not be equally yoked with unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14-15) and we forsake His exact directions by accepting less than He has for us.

When Lust Conceives

When we are single, loneliness tends to darken our doorsteps. In the darkness comes sin – sexual immorality, lust, greed, and faithlessness.

The truth of the matter is, if we do not pray, talk to God with a humble heart, and ask for His guidance, we will make the wrong choices over, over, and over again.

Look through the looking glass of the Israelites and the hardships they endured in the desert. As a Christian single, your life might feel like a journey of bondage filled with loneliness, pain, and perhaps even brokenness.

Have you ever thought that maybe God has not blessed you with your divine mate because you aren’t ready for him or her? Or perhaps maybe the responsibility of a relationship calls for more strength and character than you have within your grasp today?

God’s Way Always Works

As a woman who has been single and abstinent for a little more than three years, there are some very simple things that have kept me strong in this single season.

I acknowledge and embrace the fact that I am not ready for a companion. It’s better to invest and focus time on my relationship with Jesus. Then, I combat lust and rebuke it in Jesus’ name. As Christians, we are already at war with those who are against our faith in God and His Word – this makes us even more susceptible to lust. In 1 John 2:16, the scripture tells us “For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world”. This passage explicitly encourages us to stay away from the temptation to sin.

My way did not work. God’s way is best. Love is indeed patient and kind (1 Corinthians 13:4-7). When we choose our way, we are inevitable to fail, however, when we allow God to direct our paths, the outcome will be greater. Yes, it can be difficult watching couples all around you sharing love and life – but think deeper. Perhaps they are compromising their Godly plans for their fleshly desires. Or, maybe they have already endured their journey in the desert and have reached their area of grace. These reasons are what has kept me and will continue to until our Father God has molded me to be His single, equally yoked woman of truth and gracefulness.

So, what is the play call?

Be silent. Be patient. Be faithful. Let’s be true to God and His plans for our lives – not just in love, but as a whole.

Remember that God will certainly bless you in His time. He will also direct you towards your path which is beyond the valleys and shadows of darkness (Psalm 23:4). God is always with you and He will not lead you astray.

Stay strong in your single season and know that your prayers do not fall on deaf ears. God answers all prayers of faith. Take heart and be filled with love.